Developing Your People Skills Begins with Understanding Yourself
People who are able to discern the feelings of others have a distinct advantage in life. They generally out earn and outperform those who cannot. Having this ability is a reflection of one’s emotional intelligence. People with high emotional intelligence understand themselves and they understand the impact they have on others. They know when and how to make the other person feel good. They are able to influence decisions. They have great people skills.
As an Advisor, it is to your advantage to have or develop great people skills.
It all begins with self-awareness, knowing yourself and knowing exactly how you influence others.
Are you aware of how others perceive you? How do folks feel when they walk away from a conversation with you? What are they thinking about when you are giving a presentation? What are your perceived strengths?
Work to strengthen those strengths and eliminate your weaknesses.
Going forward, focus on what you do well. Continually ask your clients for feedback. How am I doing? What is it about my service that you like or dislike? What two or three things could I do differently to better serve you?
Very few things impact like passion. Passion is contagious and I hope you are the most passionate person you know. If you are passionate about people achieving their goals, they will choose you over the less passionate competition.
Are you always in control of your attitude? Attitude is an enormous part of self-awareness. Choose to be positive and you will be rewarded many times over. Avoid those things that have a negative impact on your life. Stay away from negative people.
Know those feelings that spur you to take action.
Those same feelings stir other people to take action. Your job is to stir up emotions. What stirs up your emotions?
Take an honest assessment of your work ethic. How badly do you want to go to the next level and are you committed to doing what that takes? It’s impossible to convince your clients to do whatever it takes on their part to achieve their goals; if, in fact, you aren’t capable of committing to achieving your goals. They won’t commit to you until you commit to them.
As well, be aware of how likeable and how trustworthy others consider you to be.
These two soft skills will carry the day. We all do business with people we like. If you don’t feel you’re particularly likeable, fix that. Likeability is not innate. It can be learned.
Likeability is as simple as holding the door for the next person; as ordinary as saying please and thank you. A genuine smile is recognized and acknowledged all over the world. As my author friend Marvin Brown always reminds everyone, follow the Golden Rule.
Trust is gained by doing the right thing consistently.
How dependable do you feel you are? Do you follow up when you say you will follow up? How do you rate yourself for consistency?
Take a self-awareness test right now. If you know you are passionate; if you have a positive attitude; if you know you can stir up emotions; if you have a strong work ethic; if you know others perceive you to be likeable and trustworthy, you have a big advantage over your competition.
Once you know and understand yourself, you can begin to know and understand others. The importance of understanding the way others think and reading their signals cannot be overstated.